Feb 14, 2013

Moving Forward


So I wrote that letter, my last post, and I knew I wouldn't be able to say everything.  I try not to think about all I have missed telling him...there is so much....there always will be...  I knew that writing a letter would help me put some things into perspective and help me come to realize how final this all is.  It was helpful...but I still sit with a dose of denial, if I'm to be honest.  I am still waiting to tell it all to him in person.....*sigh*......




And just so you all know, I really do appreciate your sweet and heartfelt comments, you are all a blessing to me!

I know that this past year I have had many posts about grief - something I never considered I would actually be blogging about.  I never knew before how deep something like this can go.  How far it can permeate into your life....and how often it comes about in ones life. 

 
 
But the Lord has been so good to me. He carried me through each and every day of this past year!  A few people have said it and I'll remark on it here, what do people, who do not know God, do?  How do they handle grief and loss?  I know they do and they can but I am so thankful that I have hope, trust and comfort in my God. ♥ 




I feel almost like a chapter has closed...I hope to post less on the loss I have faced - not because I want to forget.  No, I could never forget my dad, he was not a man easily forgotten! :)  But because the Lord is carrying me forward and I am to look to the things ahead.

I want to thank you all for your encouragement, support and prayers through this! 



I wish to go forward and celebrate the man my dad was and the impact he has had in my life and the lives of those around me.  And in honesty I am glad that this past year is behind me.  All those 'firsts' are over and now the new normal sets in.


There are many ways I will hold to his memory.  Food! ;)  He loved food!  Cooking was a passion of his. It's because of him I learned that they have a whole tv station dedicated to food!  Music - you all know what I think about that and much of my love of music is rooted in him.  Gardening...I hope!  He was an amazing gardener and I hope to follow in his footsteps!  Family - he loved his family! Deeply, passionately and loyally.  I will uphold honesty, integrity, determination, hard work and a hearty laugh all in his memory.



With this one year anniversary behind me, I feel as if a weight has lifted. I am ready to move forward.  I will move forward, holding in my heart a great man, and looking to what the future will bring.  I have learned to embrace the precious moments that life offers and live fully right where God has me.  I have grown to know the Lord in a deeper and more intimate way - a way that I would never have known for not this past year.




And so I have loved and loss and yes, it was better then not having loved at all!  It hurt...hurts, but there are many good things.  Beautiful memories and cherished moments!  There will always be a part of him with me and in me.  I praise my heavenly Father and thank Him for the gift that my earthly father was to me.  And I will celebrate his life by living mine fully, without regret and with great love. 




I think both of my Father's will be pleased.







5 comments:

  1. Great pictures. Cute little girls.
    Time will heal...but your memories of your dad will carry on to cheer you up!

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  2. Lovely post. Did Joe get in on the cookie business as well? From a song, "I can see in you, the glory of my king, and I love you with the love of the Lord."

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  3. I enjoyed the pictures that went with your words. It shows that you are moving forward. I cannot imagine the pain of losing a parent. I am so grateful I still have mine. Remember, grief doesn't have a time limit. Grief is a period of time.

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  4. I simply cannot believe it's already been a year since you lost your dad...time doesn't ever slow down does it?
    I loved all your pics~I found it interesting that you were glad to be thru the first year...I never thought about all the "firsts". I like how you stated your "new" normal may begin. I like that perspective. Praying for you~as I cannot imagine losing a parent.
    {hugs}

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  5. I love your pictures!! And your daughters are adorable.

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